My oldest son has been grappling with the unknown as he entered his first couple weeks of Kindergarten. Between the stomach flu and abnormal routines, he has found himself overwhelmed by newness and even his own expectations of himself.
As a mom, I’ve struggled with watching my boy struggle. It has brought back memories of what it was like for me as a tiny version of a perfectionist to enter the unknown and struggle to achieve my standards. But as much as I wish I could take away the hard and the challenge, I could only offer my son the one thing that has given me freedom from my fear and my self.
“Buddy, momma knows what it’s like to feel the room spinning and to be overwhelmed. I know what it’s like to feel like I can’t do something right… and I know what it’s like to get mad at myself for it. But do you know Who gives me strength to keep breathing and keep trying?”
“Who?” he asks, eyes wide.
“Jesus. To this day, I still will close my eyes, take a deep breath, and breathe out in the middle of my fear that I trust Him. It’s called a breath prayer. Sometimes I just say His name, and He knows I’m asking for His help.”
“He does? Because He knows everything?”
“Yeah, buddy. And most of all, He loves you. He knows what causes the room to spin for you. And He is right there for you, able to help it slow down, able to help you try again.”
My little boy nodded. I honestly wasn’t sure if he understood.
I picked him up today, and he told me, “Momma, I got overwhelmed today. But I closed my eyes and breathed out Jesus.”
I don’t know who needs this today, but I’m guessing that there is a leader who, like me and my son, needs to submit the overwhelm of this day to the power of the name of Jesus.
My friend, your fear and even your own expectations are no match before the power of the name of Jesus. Breathe His name and trust He knows even better than you what you are asking for… He knows what causes the room to spin for you, and He is more than able to hold you until the dizziness passes.
Close your eyes. Say His name. And keep going.